Oh, My Stars and Garters!

Original post on 12/19/07 at Half-Past Kissin' Time

Recently, feeling overwhelmed with too much to do and not enough time to do it, I stated that I was "running around like a chicken with my head cut off!" and I grinned, recognizing yet another of my mom's famous expressions. Since I wrote about her (in the sidebar there), family members have helped me recall a few more (believe it or not!) In the world of Language Arts, these are also known as idioms or figures of speech. My family knows them as "Momisms." Here are some Momisms for the holidays.

"Oh, My Stars and Garters!" (Seriously; she really says this.) It's the perfect exclamation for opening that extra special Christmas gift (or a good stall for when you don't know what to say, having opened a gift that leaves you otherwise speechless). Mom says it any time she is just plain "tickled."

"Beggars can't be choosers," Mom has often chided over the years. It simply means to be gracious when someone gives you something you asked for or needed but may not exactly be what you had in mind. (This is perfect for the child who spits out the anise candy he asked for at Grandma's). Don't be picky if you're getting something for free.

"Hold your horses, Girl!" Plain and simple, this means don't go so fast, or stop and think! So, when you are about to say, "Ewwwww" when opening the sweater from Aunt Sally, say to yourself, "Hold your horses, Girl!"

"Don't take any wooden nickels!" This is a piece of advice that just means Have a nice day! but could also mean, "Don't be a sucker." (Guess it would fit for when you're working the Red Kettle this season.)

"Follow me; I'm right behind you!" Mom says this when you're getting too far ahead of her walking somewhere. She says it cheerfully, just like you are not actually being inconsiderate by walking like a speed demon and leaving your poor mother in the dust. A very gentle, loving way of saying, "Please slow down, you thoughtless child!"

Put a nice dinner on the table, and Mom will facetiously say, "Wow! That looks good enough to eat!" (Try that one with Grandma this year, and see if she cuffs you in the head :)

"Don't bite the hand that feeds you!" Better be nice; show appreciation to those who are good to you. (Not sure what circumstance Mom used this one for, but I'm pretty sure it had to do with me being snotty to her during adolescence.) Kids, especially, should keep this one in mind during the holidays; Santa is always watching!